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WendyShinyo   

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62 Pathfinder Level 1

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  • Birthday 01/11/1953

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  • Areas of Training
    Life Coaching
    Mindfulness
    CBT
    NLP
    Counselling
  • Niche
    Career coaching and Buddhist-based/mindfulness-based life coaching

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  1. I LOVE this! Thank you so much, @Donnie "Coach" Hall! I will use this technique immediately. It is so aligned with my coaching philosophy and style, which comes from a more Japanese Buddhist / Japanese psychology approach. It reminds me of sand mandalas, the Japanese tea ceremony, or drawing the ensō. And your other point about the price he is paying is right on. He knows the price he is paying and that's why he reached out. The interesting thing is that he has come to some of the realizations, but needs some more 'tricks' to ingrain new thought processes. I will let you know how this works out. Thank you! 🙏
  2. I totally agree about the depression label. And sometimes I see that people label themselves as having depression ... or other, like anxiety or obsession-compulsion. Once labeled, it becomes almost like a badge and a subliminal 'excuse' to remain that way. To use the Buddhist concept of sunyata or 'things as they are', nothing or no one is a discrete thing, and everything is dependent on causes and conditions, which arise and fall away. Once something is labeled, it tends to freeze the thing as permanent, which of course, nothing is. I think those of us as helpers need to point to this as a "Fact" (in contrast to feelings and faith), which opens up endless possibilities for our clients. Instead of thinking that "this is how things are", the horizon opens to change. If you change the conditions (reflect on thoughts, be self-aware, and apply concepts that will change the thoughts), then the result: 'depression' or whatever will change. I realize I have 'labeled' this concept as "Buddhist" for conversational convenience, which can bring up thoughts of religion and 'faith' or belief. But what I am sharing is a philosophy and it is easily observable in everyone's life ... no belief required. 😉
  3. Great thread overall. Mindfulness is the key, but hard to get established. I am currently working with a client who came to me for the mindfulness perspective. He has long-standing issues that he refers to as 'depression', but in our work together, it seems we may be discovering it is more like insecurity and not feeling good enough, so he constantly strives to be perfect and for everything in his work and home life to be "perfect." We, of course, established nothing IS! @Donnie "Coach" Hall, I really like your idea about drawing and singing. I was thinking about something like that to help him do something that he KNOWS he can't be good at. It seems he tries to be perfect at everything, including art and fitness (Iron Man). I'd like to explore something that he realizes with his 'wise mind' he can never be perfect, or even particularly good at. He is getting better at mindfulness and catching where he is going down the rabbit hole, but now we need to find something that he can 'play' with to experience how you can fail or be not great and be happy. He is still pretty miserable because he replays his scripts constantly.
  4. WendyShinyo

    Adding some Budha in my life.

    Sure, let's keep it for GMT -5 on Wednesday, the 4th of September ... and you can talk to me about what you envision for something more structured. That way, when more people are involved, we can have a 'plan.' Did you want to Zoom?
  5. WendyShinyo

    Adding some Budha in my life.

    That's a date and time that works for me. Are you suggesting we talk separately, first, or just go ahead and make it an open event?
  6. WendyShinyo

    Adding some Budha in my life.

    Excellent! Keep a look out. It looks like things are in the works 🙂
  7. WendyShinyo

    Adding some Budha in my life.

    Thanks, Misty! We'll get back to you. The event sounds great!
  8. WendyShinyo

    Adding some Budha in my life.

    Sure ... how about sometime next week? What days/ times would be good for you? Next week, I'm good most days, except possibly Monday, which is a holiday in the States. Suggest some days/times then we can sync up and I can tag Misty to arrange an event for us. You can host if you'd like, since this was your vision. 😉
  9. WendyShinyo

    Adding some Budha in my life.

    I hope we can get something together that would be helpful for all interested. Maybe we can organize some sort of regular session or chat? I'm really not all that familiar with what would be available within Achology ... or if we set-up something elsewhere? David? Others?
  10. WendyShinyo

    Adding some Budha in my life.

    I am in Rochester, New York (UTC / GMT -4). I will be gone most of this Friday, 8/31, for a 'beach day' and will not be in an area for good phone signal. Is there another day/time that would work?
  11. WendyShinyo

    Adding some Budha in my life.

    I would LOVE to chat ... and would be happy to chat with anyone else who is interested. It would be a great discussion! Let me know and we can work something out.
  12. WendyShinyo

    Adding some Budha in my life.

    I am a long-time career coach, but also a Buddhist practitioner, teacher, and lay minister. If not for the teachings of Buddha, there is no part of my life or coaching business that would have thrived. Starting in the careers business, as a resume writer in the mid-1980's before there were career coaches, I soon learned that working closely with people to help them attain their goals took so much more than the implied concept of the work of a "resume writer." With each client session it felt like I was called—sometimes to beyond what I thought was possible—to be my best self so that I could be the best friend, counselor, listener, and motivator I could be. At the same time of my immersion into career coaching, I also immersed myself into Buddhist study and practice, eventually becoming a Sensei (teacher) and minister. And those two studies and practices have been impossible to separate ever since. It was the study of myself that allowed me to be my best self for my clients. It allowed me to see clearly, helped me to suspend judgment, and have equanimity, so that I could open my mind and heart to the clients hoping I would help them. I think that's what coaching is all about. Coaches aren't advice-givers or gurus, but open-minded conversation partners that help clients come back to their own questions and discover the answers their own wisdom and introspection enables them to see. Buddhist teachings and practices are core to how I help clients answer their own questions. 🙂 I think of it as spiritual friendship. In Buddhism it is referred to as "kalyana mitta" (Pali for good or admirable friend). In the Pali Canon Upaddha Sutta, the Buddha replied to his disciple, Ananda, who said, "This is half of the holy life, lord: admirable friendship, admirable companionship, admirable camaraderie." The Buddha replied this way: "'Don't say that, Ananda. Don't say that. Admirable friendship, admirable companionship, admirable camaraderie is actually the whole of the holy life. When a monk has admirable people as friends, companions, and comrades, he can be expected to develop and pursue the noble eightfold path."
  13. WendyShinyo

    Coaching contract?

    Hello all! Quick intro to frame things. I've been in the career coaching segment for many years. I have a contract for those clients, encompassing both coaching and writing services (resumes, LinkedIn profiles, etc.). I've been attracting more life, mindfulness, and Buddhist/Japanese Psychology coaching thanks to what I've learned from Kain's courses and this forum ... and from gaining more exposure / promotion through my podcast. I've been using the same contract up until now, but wondered if anyone had anything they could share for just life coaching or counseling? Thanks in advance! _/|\_ Wendy
  14. Spirituality is the "ISness" of life ... the BEINGness that lies deeper than the labels of your relationships (mother, father, wife, sister, husband, brother) or your job title/function. It is the thing that you cannot name ... that is why so many people are struggling to put words to it in their responses. As soon as you label it, it 'becomes' a religion. At it's core, it is what is, at the moment it is. It is the deeper thing we have felt in ourselves, yet are often too busy to stop and sense again. In Buddhism (the philosophy), it is referred to as suchness or things as they are.
  15. Is it OK to share exciting news? You guys feel like my family already! 🙂I launched a podcast on "Everyday Buddhism" (my coaching vehicle) exactly three weeks ago and I noticed today that it made it to the Top 10 in iTunes in the Buddhist category. I had to share. Keep going everyone! Anything is possible!

    1. JoLearns

      JoLearns

      Congrats Wendy! 😉

       

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