Jump to content


  • Content count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won


Neil last won the day on July 8

Neil had the most liked content!

Community Reputation

141 Pathfinder Level 2

Community Group


Professional Information

  • Areas of Training
    Life Coaching

Recent Profile Visitors

The recent visitors block is disabled and is not being shown to other users.

  1. Neil

    Psicotic people have good intentions?!

    @Soniacrafts I've been talking about something similar on this thread: An interesting topic which has generated some top responses.
  2. I thought I'd take this question from the other thread where it appeared and make a proper Q and A topic out of it: https://achology.com/community/topic/116-how-do-you-deal-with-bad-intentions/ So do you as coaches take sides? Is it necessary to build that bond, to create that "I'm on your side" feeling? Or as coaches is it a responsibility to be completely impartial? Also is it an act if you do take sides or do you connect in such a way with your subjects that you really are on their side?
  3. Neil

    How do you deal with bad intentions?

    Is it a basic human need to make more money. I'm talking hypothetically here to try and find a point where this all breaks down. The staff member isn't meeting a basic need as their basic needs are met, they have a job, they have clothes on their back, a place to stay and are comfortable. I have come across many people in business and personally who just want more and are willing to screw people to get it. You just have to look at politics to see a multitude of examples. I don't think people always come from good intentions or to meet a basic human need. Quite often they can come from a place of greed. I think my point here is you are coaching the Manager, not the staff member. How do they deal with it? Or maybe nobody is being coached here, just a manager trying to find a way to deal with their staff member. If coaching the staff member then we could get to the bottom of the greedy, I want I want attitude but the manager probably wont have the skills to do this, plus who says there is a reason and it can be solved. People can just be greedy for no real reason right? It's part of society these days.
  4. Neil

    The Coffee Lounge

    Tastes much nicer with brown sugar than white. White makes it too sweet. No idea if it's a European thing.
  5. Neil

    The Coffee Lounge

    Being a computer person I'm almost 90% coffee. Matthew Algie is my preferred brand. No sugar required with their coffees, although I normally like some brown sugar in other coffees. Comforting cup of tea is also nice.
  6. Hi Waldamar, your were our second signup! Welcome to the community.

    1. Waldamar


      Thanks, glad to be here

  7. Neil

    How do you deal with bad intentions?

    Great input guys. To clarify I'm not coming from a coaching angle, more of the self-helpers angle. I've just been mulling over some of Kain's words from the course and as I like to do, over think, analyse and try and break them. So are you saying Debby that if this manager came to you with this issue of a coworker looking to usurp them and from your questions you found that they lacked self confidence and self worth, that you would then build on this so the manager could fight back? Is that too much like taking sides for a coach? Is taking sides necessarily bad? If it is bad, how do you as a coach stop yourself doing it.....perhaps this would be another good topic/video for someone to post on another thread and explain further.
  8. Neil

    How do you deal with bad intentions?

    Great answer Debby, especially the last paragraph. I've been trying to think of situations where you wise words might not work. So I thought of business and relationships within a company. Say you have a manager and one of their staff is angling for their job. Now this person could be doing all sorts to undermine and make the manager out to be incompetent just to get a better job. So applying you questions and finding this out doesn't help you as there will be no resolution until they get the managers job or the manager fights back and manipulates things to their advantage... I.e get them sacked. I think what I'm trying to get at is being faced with a human obstacle dead set on changing your world for the worst, how can that be dealt with without resorting to more devious tactics. Whats the resolution? I know what I'd do. But then again I think I'm quite mean. Can anyone else think of a better example than mine? It's just something I've been mulling over. It's not something that affects me at all but I like to push these principles (in my head) to the limit to see if they stand up in all scenarios.
  9. In Kain's life coaching course he discusses intentions and being mindful of your own emotions before reacting to something someone says or does. Assuming the other persons intentions are good then I have found this is relatively easy to achieve. But let's face it not everyone's intentions are good, even if they aren't an inherently "bad" person. People naturally manipulate situations to suit themselves not necessarily to best help the other person. How does everybody deal with these kinds of situations and people? Is the only way to confront, discuss, accept and forgive? I think I often struggle with the latter especially if there is no remorse for the hurt or negative impact on your life.
  10. I think this is bang on. If you talk to someone like a friend and show genuine interest in them and what's being said thena lot more comes out in the conversation. Although I don't feel all the above questions necessarily fit into a small talk category, they are all good ones!
  11. Neil

    Community Release

    It's going to be good. Can't wait to see some great conversations happening on these rather splendid forums!
  12. Neil

    Forum Rules

    The Vision We want the forums to become a place for mature discussion. Discussing topics from the courses and other topics relating to modern applied psychology. There is a multitude of practises and techniques available to practitioners and if you have experience in them we welcome you talking about them on the forum. We love inspiring, informative written and video content! So be creative, be inspiring, be supportive but above all be an Achologist. Self Promotion No self-promotional posts. Users found to be self-promoting in the forums will receive warning points. This community is a place of learning, understanding and growing. This includes using this community to reach out to members one-on-one. There will be a place for experienced Achologists to connect with paying clients in the future. This is currently in development but first, we need experience Achologists. The only forum that allows links to your content, such as video, Facebook pages or blogs is Let's Talk Business. Linking is allowed there in order to get feedback or help other Achologists learn and grow. Please read the rules thread there before posting any links. External linking, spam and advertising Spam is not tolerated. All automated messages and advertisements will be deleted. Only external links that compliment context and add value will be allowed. Warning points will be given for spamming and inappropriate external linking. Hidden posts Any post containing an image, video or link to a site outside of Achology will require moderator approval. If your post or reply shows as hidden it is awaiting approval. Moderators will approve these posts as quickly as possible. Posting in the forum Community members should search the forum for answers before posting their question. The search box can be found at the top right of the forum. Refrain from posting the same question in multiple forums. Please find the appropriate forum to post in, posting in the incorrect forum creates additional workload for moderators. Messages posted in the wrong topic area will be removed and placed in the correct forum by moderators. If you feel there is no suitable place for your post please put it in “the Lounge” which is for more general discussions. We are open to suggestions for new forums for specific topics. Language, respect and tone We have high standards! We’re trying to foster great conversation and we will remove comments that harm that endeavour. Respect other users. No abusing fellow forum members. Abusive posts will be deleted and members will be given warning points. People who continue to post inflammatory, abusive comments will have any memberships cancelled, banning and a refund will be issued. No threats or harassment of other users will be tolerated. Any instance of threatening or harassing behaviour is grounds for immediate deletion from the forums. No profanity or pornography is allowed and will result in warning points. Posts containing adult material will be deleted. Be kind, respectful and non-judgemental of others. This is a place of learning, not criticising. Use your common sense here and think before you comment. Give genuine feedback to others. We are here to help each other grow. Topic Bumping 'Bumping' describes commenting on your own forum topic so that a particular topic is returned to the top in the list of forum topics. Some users may even post a message with only the word "bump" to indicate they are posting only to bump the thread to the top of the list where more users will see it. This is unacceptable in Achology and users found doing this will receive warning points. Illegal content No posting of copyrighted materials or other illegal content is allowed. Any posts containing illegal content or copyrighted materials will be deleted. Warning points will be issued for Achologists who are found to be doing this. Images All profile/avatar images should be 150 x 150 pixels or smaller. When posting images in topics please make sure they are web optimised and no larger than 1000px wide. Over-sized images will be removed. Reporting topics/posts which break the rules There is a report button located at the top right side on each post in a topic, simply click this, provide a reason and the forum moderators will be alerted. Warning Points Warning points will be given for any of the mentioned offences. If 3 points are given in a 30 day period, this will result in an immediate membership cancellation, banning and a refund will be issued. However, it is at our discretion that a membership ban may be given on the first offence.