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Mary   

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  1. Hi Karen, Since this incident just occurred, give it some time. Its a normal reaction of your brain reminding you to be more careful. It will probably fade quickly. If it doesn't I would suggest NLP timeline work since you are working in the NLP class right now or depending on how bad it becomes, a therapist might be the way to go. My door is open, if you would like to PM me, I'll be happy to see what I can do to help you. Thanks, Debby for the heads up, Mary
  2. Mary

    Whats in a Logo?

    @shannon, don't let lack of a logo hold you back, keep looking but keep moving forward.
  3. Mary

    Favourite Quotes

    "Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children." Eric Draven from the Crow "Don't you cry for Johns, don't you dare." Riddick from Pitch Black "I am the storm." Ethan Hunt from MI: Fallout "I gripped you tight and raised you from perdition." Castiel from Supernatural
  4. Sometimes you need to jump in without being prepared or you can lose years of your life waiting to be prepared. Jump out of the comfort zone and knock down the first domino. If you are lucky, they will just keep falling. If not, pick a different domino.
  5. I think this depends on how you respond. On where you set your boundaries. My daughter, since she was a teenager was not allowed to play with her phone if she was out with family for dinner. It was time to catch up with the family members present. Now that she is an adult, sometimes we will both play a game while waiting for food because we talked in the car on the way to where we were eating. I had a co-worker insist on coming with my friend and I to lunch while we were at a training event. Not a problem really until we sat down and she is glued to her phone. My friend, Shu and I look at each other and tell her if she wants to have lunch with us, she needs to put down the phone and be present with us. She's a much better lunch companion since then and she is pretty interesting once she actually talked to us rather than scrolled on her phone. I play trivia at a bar with some of my friends a couple of times a month, we have to put our phones down during the game and then we are very focused on catching up with each other, in the breaks, people tend to jump on their phones. I have mixed feelings about it.
  6. Mary

    Owning Our True Identity

    Q1) Wow there have been a lot of them over the years. One of my favorites was given to me by someone I played AD&D with in college. Ben said, "Mary, most of the time, you are chaotic good and just hum along. But you have this neutral evil streak." LOL. My gaming friends love that one too. I own it. Q2) I'm not sure what you mean by "box" in, though I am guessing what you are after is what holds me back from fully being me. I have a lot of those too. Shy is one, writer (because I'm really a lot more creative than just that), Mom/caretaker (just listing that makes me tired). I think the real trick with labels is to discard the ones that don't serve you and find ways to keep the ones that do. On top of this, reevaluate at period intervals to make sure that what you have kept is still relevant. I also find aspirational labels to be wonderful too.
  7. FB is currently beta testing fee based groups. They've just started, so you might want to wait and see what they decide about it. It could make your life a lot easier.
  8. Mary

    Show your business cards please!

    I'm not sure why you would put your birthday on your business cards? I skip my physical address in favor of my facebook page address. I carry them for when I meet someone I would like to stay in touch with. More like an old fashion calling card.
  9. Mary

    What daily rituals do you have?

    The dogs wake me up in the morning between 5:30 and 6:30 am. I take them out for a quick walk and then I sit down and set my tasks for the day. I set three goals daily to move me forwards towards my four big goals of the year (three in total, not 12) and then add in whatever household work needs to get done. I also try to set a fun goal for the day.
  10. Mary

    Welcome to the book club!!

    Currently reading The Woman's Retreat Book by Jennifer Louden. Tons of interesting ideas for planning a retreat.
  11. I try to "unstick" them by saying to them. "You know why you are stuck, what is going on?" if that doesn't work, and you get the I don't know answer, try "pretend that you do know, then what would the answer be?" That works sometimes. They do know what is going on, they are the only one who does!
  12. Mary

    Read any good books lately?

    Thanks for the suggestion, Sam, I'll look into it.
  13. I have found that often through small talk you can begin a values elicitation. Often what they choose to say and how they say it can open that door without doing a formal elicitation. You have to check back with your client to make sure what you heard is really what they meant, but you can learn a lot if you can be quiet and let them say it!
  14. Mary

    Experience

    I try not to tell my sad story because the client is more interested in how I get help them help themselves out of the hole they ended up in. I think one of the most important things about finding a niche is to work in areas where you actually have experience.
  15. Mary

    The Compassionate Mind

    I think that positive regard is compassion with a step back. It allows you to work in the situation without being as entangled with the emotions and possibly attachment to the outcomes of the coaching. If a client isn't willing to take responsibility and make changes, being a step back makes it easy to see that we need to let that client go until they are ready to take responsibility.
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